Fate

What’s common between Aruna Shanbaug, Danielle Lierow, James Bulger, Junko Furuta, and Jyothi Singh Pandey (more commonly known as Nirbhaya)?

We all know what happened to them, but we don’t know why it happened to them. Maybe in the case of Jyothi, we can probe her rapists, feature them in documentaries, and get their chauvinistic reasons for committing such a cold-blooded crime. That probe, though, would never answer why it was Jyothi who met such a fate. In all probability, the rapists would have done the same if it were some other girl in Jyothi’s place that unfortunate day.

When you start asking questions like “Why did Jyothi choose to watch the movie on that particular day?” “Why did Jyothi choose a late night show?” “Why did they not wait for a different vehicle?” you would eventually hit this one enigmatic roadblock called fate.

There’s no reason apart from fate that can explain why Jyothi particularly was the victim. And similarly, why Shanbaug or Furuta or Bulger or Lierow were/are victims. Out of the five people listed, only Lierow and Shanbaug are alive today. Lierow survives today, albeit without the necessary development in her thinking faculty, which makes her much different from kids of her age. She’s a 5 year old kid trapped in a 14 year old’s body, thanks to the grave injustice her mother caused by just being negligent and unconcerned of her baby.

While Lierow at least survives today, Shanbaug just exists. Sadly, Shanbaug has been just existing for the past 42 years.

So, on one hand, we have a kid who couldn’t reach the peak of human creativity and potential, and on the other, a 66 year old lady who could have served mankind in more ways than one (Shanbaug was a nurse), if not for fate.

Contemplation of the concept called fate opens up a discussion about karma. While karma is a very convenient excuse for explaining why something happens to someone, it again leads to a multitude of uncomfortable questions. According to karma, what goes around comes back around. If we believe that the perpetrators of a heinous crime will someday or the other experience the same magnitude of pain they inflicted, we should also be ready to accept arguments that the victim became a victim because he/she was a perpetrator some time.

Let me explain this with an example. In India, we have elders who threaten kids that if they (kids) kill an insect, they’d be born as the same insect in their next birth and the insect would be born as the person and exact revenge through a reversal of roles. This kind of a threat is certainly said with good intentions. After all, kids should learn to not harm insects, they must realise that insects are living beings that can feel pain too. But using this threat of karma can backfire massively. What if some super-smart kid asks, “Why can’t it be that I was this insect in my previous birth and the insect was the human being who killed me in that birth? Why can’t we consider that our roles have reversed now and I’m exacting revenge for the wrong that happened to me?”

These are for sure very valid questions. Karma is like the circus thuppaakki that Kamal Hassan wields in Aboorva Sagodharargal. It can shoot forward; it can also shoot backward.

I don’t even want to talk about the kind of backlash and rebuke someone would face if they insisted that Jyothi Singh Pandey had wronged someone in the past and that’s why she suffered such a horrific end. And admonishment in that case is undoubtedly valid because of the argument’s sheer ridiculousness and absurdity.

We can avoid such uncomfortable questions and stances by avoiding the argument of karma. Moreover, we don’t even know certainly if rebirth is true. You can choose to believe in it based on the accounts of people who regressed into their past lives and recalled perfect details from those lives. But those are rare instances. Rational, practical thinking requires evidence for belief.

Therefore, it’s good to treat fate as a stand-alone entity that’s as intriguing as our very existence is.

In the midst of such perplexing arguments, one school of thought says man is capable of controlling fate, and another says that it’s definitely fate that controls man’s life.

I personally don’t know which of these is true, for I’ve been in situations where I’ve felt in control throughout and in others where control was just a bunch of sour grapes, and I, the aspiring fox.

In reality, I believe life is a mix of both scenarios. There are some things that we can control and some things that we can’t. For instance, wearing a helmet whenever we ride motorbikes/wearing the seatbelt whenever we drive cars is an action that’s under our control. We can choose to perform or not to perform that action. However, wearing a helmet alone does not guarantee a shield from death, for there have been cases where those wearing helmets have succumbed in accidents and those who did not were saved miraculously. Those are the things that are beyond our control. But still, wearing a helmet is a good practice because it’s been statistically and rationally proven that helmets minimize the risk of death during accidents, if not eliminate it.

So, that’s how fate is. Mysterious. We can try our best to manipulate life the way we want, but what has to happen will happen, no matter how hard we try to avoid its occurrence.

What we can further do is ensure that we truly exercise our control over those things that we can control and count our blessings regarding those things that are beyond our control. No amount of worrying, complaining, or whining can influence fate in your favour. Fate seems to have a mind of its own.

Unfortunately, Furuta, Jyothi, Bulger, Shanbaug, and Lierow are some victims of fate.

But people like Malvika Iyer are victors of fate. 

'NCC Mindset' - Inflicting Unnecessary Pain

There's this particular type of mindset that I'd like to classify as 'NCC mindset'. I chose to name it that because it's mostly found among NCC cadets in colleges. When in their first year, their seniors make them perform extremely physically exhausting activities in the name of 'punishment'. These junior cadets know how it hurts and how pointless and unnecessary such punishments are sometimes. They feel pain at that moment. They feel the same pain for at least one full year.

Come second year, these guys become senior cadets, and some new students join the NCC. Now, since these new 'seniors' know what punishment and pain is, do they refrain from inflicting it on their juniors? No. They don't. They continue the same 'tradition' of punishment. Ask them why, and they'd reply, "We suffered punishment from our seniors. Why should these guys have it easy?"

Seriously? Is that even a way to deal with people? And the funny thing is this is not even a 'tit for tat' kind of enmity. This is unwanted enmity, that just sows seeds of hatred in people. Sadly, this mindset is not prevalent just in NCC. It's found among most of us too. I've only used NCC as an analogy here.

We think, "I didn't have it easy. Why should someone else have it so?" and do things to make others' lives miserable. It's important to remember the saying "Treat others the way you'd want to be treated" at all times. That will prevent us from inflicting pain upon others.

No particular incident triggered this post. Just a thought. :)

Why It's Unfair to Ridicule the "I am Mukesh" Ad (A Translation)

I recently came across this wonderful status update by a Tamilian who's very active on Facebook. Like the title of this post suggests, it was about how people mock at the Late Mukesh Harane when he's shown in the ad and how it's completely unfair and insensitive. I agree with his viewpoints. That's the reason I decided to translate the status update, which was in Tamil, into English.

Please find it below:

"Knowingly or unknowingly, the “I am Mukesh” ad has become the subject of humour and ridicule among people.

Even though Mukesh’s speech might make you laugh, it is the deathbed confession of a cancer patient. Though the voiceover (in Tamil) sounds similar to the funny ones you can find in Chinese movies dubbed into Tamil, the message the ad wants to put across is very much true.

Being someone who used to consume tobacco, marijuana, and liquor, I now keep talking about their ill-effects, on social media. Please try your best to spread cancer awareness among your dear ones.

If you can’t, at least try to not make a mockery of ads like the one mentioned, which are aimed at creating awareness.

Mukesh is certainly not a national hero. But he’d have agreed to record details of his hardships, just with the good intention that his death should be some kind of a lesson for others.

We should ask ourselves if it’s fair to mock at a deceased person for the noble message he wanted to convey. We can avoid becoming the next Mukesh if we heed the words of that poor soul.

Those who know how painful and low the voice of a person with throat or mouth cancer sounds will never mock at Mukesh’s confession.

One of my friends had recently gone to the cinema with her kids. It seems the audience clapped and jeered at the Mukesh ad when it was played. My friend told me that even her kids had a good laugh, saying, “Yay! Mukesh is dying.”

Let’s keep aside the issue of ignoring the awareness messages shared by a dying cancer patient. It is evident that it is we who are completely responsible for sowing the same attitude of ridiculing his deathbed confession, among children.

I have seen kind individuals who share “Let’s prevent cancer” messages to spread awareness, and those who voluntarily come to the aid of cancer patients. Our ridicule of the Mukesh ad might also lead to the danger of others’ ridiculing the service of these kind people.

I myself have referenced cancer-based movie comedy scenes during conversations with my friends, in the past.

But it’s when my mother suffered from cancer that I realized it isn’t a matter of joke.

If you have to laugh (at the ad), laugh within yourself. You might be a gutsy person who isn’t afraid of death. But please avoid making jokes about Mukesh in the public space.

Just think of how a cancer patient would be able to stay casual if he/she were sitting next to you in the movie theatre and found themselves in a situation where the ad is ridiculed.

The ad is one reason I don’t even think of taking my mother to the cinemas. But my fear worsens when I think of whether she’ll be able to bear the mockery of the ad that happens in the theatre. I slightly feel shaken when I think whether this mockery would shatter all the motivation we have given to help her fight cancer.

This is my request to all the tomorrow’s Mukeshes who make fun of yesterday’s Mukesh: Please spare a thought about it.

If you cannot, just consider this as an “over-hyped, over-reactive” status update that is begging for likes.

A special salute to the deceased Mukesh. My special prayers for him for the noble thought to portray his sufferings as a lesson to others.

Thanks."

PS: This is my humble attempt at translating a post that I personally felt made perfect sense and was completely necessary. I have tried my best to not distort the actual message anywhere. But I might have gone wrong somewhere. Please feel free to bring it to my notice if you feel so. Will make the corrections required.

Links:
For the original post: https://www.facebook.com/umamaheshwaran.panneerselvam/posts/10201614246831423

Also, there's been a misconception among some people that Mukesh Harane is alive even now. However, I found through Google that he's indeed no more. Here's a news article that proves it: http://www.indianexpress.com/news/dead-son-face-of-anticancer-fight-family-lives-in-penury/1049922/

And a majority of people hate the graphic images shown in the beginning of the ad. That's understandable. However, the government will soon replace the existing ads with a set of new ones. For more info: http://www.business-standard.com/article/pti-stories/new-anti-tobacco-audio-visuals-released-113100101180_1.html

Why We Need More Animated Movies

Anthropomorphic toys. Houses that fly with just the help of helium balloons. Rats that get under a cook’s toque and almost become a secondary brain. Cavemen using starfish to create makeshift footwear. You have seen them all and you will see more, thanks to animated movies.

Nineteen ninety-five is a landmark year in the history of animation. The first ever 3D animated movie of the world—Toy Story—released with great fanfare and managed to capture many a heart across the world. It wasn’t until 2010, the year the final part of the trilogy released, that I got to watch the movie, however. Since then I’d have watched the entire Toy Story trilogy at least 4-5 times.

It’s not just the treat to the eyes that makes me love animated movies. The messages they try to convey, the lessons they strive to teach, the efforts they take to remind “mankind” of “humanity”. Not many movies remind us of the ‘fun’ side and good things of life as much as animated movies do.

Woody and Buzz (Toy Story) taught me to not give up on friendship, no matter what situation one is in. Horton (Horton Hears a Who) taught me that everyone, irrespective of their size and status, deserves to be treated well. Guy (The Croods) taught me to follow light in order to progress in life and that change is not such a bad thing. Carl and Ellie (Up), in that little montage, showed me how married life is supposed to be. Hero Girl (The Polar Express) taught me the value of belief. Mumble (Happy Feet) showed that it’s ok for one to be different. Alex, Marty, Gloria, and Melman (Madagascar) showed me that people can be great friends despite their differences. Marlin (Finding Nemo) showed me what pure fatherly love is. Diego (Ice Age) taught me it's never too late to turn a new leaf and be a good person.

I can go on. I can keep talking endlessly about characters in animated movies and what I learnt from them.

Considering that the first ever 3D-animated movie came out in 1995, we can see that 3D animation is just a teenager. But a very responsible teenager who knows what’s right and wrong. One who understands life. One who values relationships more than materialistic pleasures. One who wishes good for all. One who continues to teach mankind of virtues. The teenager whom parents wish their kids would hopefully emulate. The ideal teenager.

I’m basically the kind of person who considers each movie a work of art. That way, animated movies easily top my list of favourite artworks. There’s so much to watch and enjoy. There’s so much to learn from them and apply in our lives.

Francis Pharcellus Church, in his famous “Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus” letter, writes:

“Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Santa Claus. It would be as dreary as if there were no VIRGINIAS. There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance to make tolerable this existence. We should have no enjoyment, except in sense and sight. The eternal light with which childhood fills the world would be extinguished.”

Animated movies, again, are like the same Santa Claus. They make tolerable this existence. Their very existence and the lessons they teach can bring happiness to people's lives. We constantly praise animated movies for the ‘imagination’ and ‘creativity’ in them. I believe they deserve praise for their ‘life’ too.

Like I said, animated movies remind “mankind” of “humanity”.

So, yes. The world does need more animated movies.

Who Said Casteism is Dead?

I really don’t know how and where to start this post. Much has been spoken about this topic by many writers, but the casteist mindset of people is still prevalent even today.

The Internet, in general, and Twitter and Facebook, in particular, have shown me how even educated people still stick to their casteist identities strongly. Caste-based handles and bios on Twitter, Facebook display names displaying one’s caste so blatantly—it’s all there in the social media world.

While the people of the city themselves have such strong casteist tendencies, it’s not surprising to see the same among people in small towns. I got to witness this personally last month when I had gone to Mantralayam for a cousin’s wedding.

I was at the ‘sathram’ having my lunch. The caterer was sitting beside me and having some discussion with another person. The conversation was in Telugu. The translation is below.

Caterer: The uggaani-bajji and other items we make cost Rs. 75 per plate.

The other person: Whoa! Really? Why is it so costly, man? We get the same thing for a much cheaper price at roadside shops.

Caterer: That’s made by maadigas. So there’d be a difference.

T.O.P: Ah, yes. You are right.

I felt really bad on hearing that conversation. I’d have taken it as a valid response if the caterer had said that the hygiene levels are low in such roadside shops. But he didn’t. It was the vendors’ caste that seemed to bother him more.

I’ve heard a lot of my relatives use the words maadigoda or maadiga munda so frequently while cussing at someone. During my childhood, I used to think it was just a generic cussword like poRukki or poRamboakku. It was not until a couple of years ago that I realized it referred to the name of a caste. That too was when I had been to the Chennai High Court regarding an accident case in which a few friends from school and I were the victims. A vehicle with the name “AAI Associates” and “Proprietor: Madiga” on it was what opened my eyes. And the vehicle was that of manual scavengers who clean up the city’s sewer system—people who regularly get themselves dirty in order to clean up our impurities. I first giggled at the appropriateness of the name “AAI Associates” for a scavenging service, but realization dawned upon me when I got to know that all these years, I’ve been hearing people use the name of a particular caste to refer to someone as inferior.

And that changed the impression I had on many people I knew.

There’s another incident that I must talk about here. This happened in 2007, the year I stepped into college. One day, we had some other lecturer substituting for one of our regular ones. I’d heard that this lecturer knew the subject well, but he wasn’t going to teach us any of it. He suddenly started lecturing on the varna differences mentioned in the Manu Smriti and justifying that Brahmins are superior and people of the other three varnas, especially Shudhras, were inferior. His substantiation was a sloka from “Purusha Sooktam”.  He went ahead with the Brahmins came from the Purusha’s head and Shudhras came from His legs crap. I hadn’t known much about the intensity of casteism in our country back then, but one of my best friends from college, Suresh, put up an argument with him. The lecturer had no rational explanation for the claim he made, but kept parroting that “The holy scripture says so. Therefore, it’s true.”

That’s another occasion when I got to know of the cheapness of the so-called high caste people.

And keep in mind, this is not the 18^th or 19^th century. This is the effing 21^st century when people are envisioning a world without boundaries and trying to make “One world. One humanity.” a reality. It is, therefore, really saddening to see such people live amidst us even today.

It’s really funny when a Brahmin says “It’s very painful to be treated as a second-class citizen in one’s own country.” Those are exactly the moments when irony commits suicide and vows not to return ever.

Yes, it’s not just Brahmins who consider themselves superior. Yes, the aforementioned caterer was not a Brahmin himself, but he belonged to another so-called high caste. Therefore, everyone shares the blame equally. But Brahmins should never talk about being considered a second-class citizen.

They are the ones who created the spark. So they should never ever cry that it has turned into a wildfire and started burning them in return. In one word, karma.

Another argument that today’s Brahmins put forward is “This is something our forefathers did. How is it fair to make us suffer the consequences?”

Well, let’s take the example of the Bhopal gas tragedy. Over 5,00,000 people were affected by a major gas leak that happened in 1984 in a Union Carbide factory. Though the exact death toll is unclear, most sources say it must be somewhere between 15 and 16,000 in the initial few days. But the tragedy did affect more than 5 lakh people, as mentioned earlier.

It’s been close to three decades since this tragedy happened, but people still claim compensation from the main culprit, Union Carbide. If you remember well, we Indians outraged greatly when Union Carbide said it’d sponsor the London Olympics in 2012. Now why do we still demand compensation from UC even after nearly 30 years? Because the impact has been very huge.

This is not very different from the impact of casteism. Why do people so strongly support reservation? Because the negative impact of your “forefathers’” casteism is great and long-running. People are still affected by it. Reservation is the compensation for those people who were suppressed in the name of casteism. If the victims of the Bhopal gas tragedy deserve compensation even after 30 years, don’t those who have been subjected to suppression for centuries together deserve it too?

Please be conscientious when you answer that question. Be objective.

I find it very painful when Brahmins say that they’re treated as second-class citizens in their own country. Just because they’re not being true to their conscience. 

Peace.

PS: You HAVE TO read the great Indian writer Mulk Raj Anand's "Untouchable" to really be able to gauge the kind of cruelty Brahmins and other high caste people perpetrated against the others. Do read. You won't regret it.

You Have Sight. Now Have a Vision.

What: Reading Sessions for Visually Challenged Students

When: All Sundays, from 10.30AM to 12.30PM

Where: PSBB,KK Nagar and Nungambakkam (annexe, near Vidyodaya School. NOT THE MAIN CAMPUS)

Why: Well, nature has given us the gift of eyesight, whereas some brothers and sisters are very unfortunate for not receiving the same. We can either carry on with our own lives or make it a bit worthwhile by investing a fraction of it in helping our friends achieve their ambitions.

What exactly you need to do: Just read out their lessons aloud for them. They are mostly Tamil/English literature students from various colleges in the city. [It's NOT compulsory to explain the lessons for them, but if you can, it'd be great.] Some students just follow the lessons, while some record them on tape. Some even take notes using Braille. Sometimes you might even be asked to write assignments for them.

What you gain: First and foremost, the satisfaction of helping people. There's no greater gain, IMO. Secondly, knowledge. You don't get to read for the same student every week. You'll be assigned to read out to a different student every week. Therefore, the chances of your gaining knowledge on different topics is very high.

What the procedure is: No procedure at all. Just walk into any of the two campuses on a Sunday morning (10.30) and tell them you're there for the reading session. The volunteers will tell you what you need to do, and allot a student.

Perks: You'll get a glass of tea and two biscuits around 11.30. :D And they also serve lunch for all after the session ends. Eating there or not is your personal choice. But trust me, the food tastes great. [This is how it used to be when I attended these sessions back in 2010. Hope it's the same now. Also, I've attended only the sessions at Nungambakkam. Never been to the KK Nagar campus. So I don't have an idea about the sessions there except the fact that they're held there as well.]

You'll get to know in what other ways you can be of help to these students once you attend a session. You can register your phone number with the organizers if you're willing to be a scribe, and they'd call you in case there's a need for scribes during exams. That's another great experience, I say. I had the opportunity of serving as a scribe once.

Well, I've summed up all the information required, I guess. Feel free to contact me if you have any other queries. Will be happy to oblige.

PS: The person who began this service has been doing it for more than 20 years. And I had the privilege of being a part of it for almost a year. I do miss these sessions a lot, and that's the reason I've been strongly insisting you guys at least to be a part of it.

The reading sessions have a break of 3-4 weeks when the students have their exams. You'll be informed of this beforehand if you attend the sessions regularly.

Also, there's a great demand for Tamil readers. So kindly attend the sessions if you can read Tamil well. தமிழ் இனி மெல்லச் சாகும் என்னும் கருத்தை உடைத்து, அச்செம்மொழியை வாழ வைப்போம்.

And do spread the word.

Service to man is service to God.

Cheers! :)

Why English Vinglish is a Must-Watch

My Twitter feed was filled with horrible rants last Saturday, thanks to the highly awful and one of the worst Telugu movies ever made - Repel, oops.. sorry, Rebel. But it took less than a week for balance to be restored, thanks to English Vinglish this time. I wasn't looking forward "eagerly" to watching EV, but I wasn't disinterested either. I went to the movie with a clean slate on my mind, and was glad in the end that it had written down a few important lessons for life.

It's a movie of how a normal housewife realizes her worth, and how she proves to people that she deserves respect too. Shashi, the lead character of the movie, knows she is talented. She is a brilliant cook and the ladoos she makes are in high demand throughout her city. But she feels bad when she doesn't get the recognition and support from where it's most expected - her family. Her English knowledge is limited, and her husband makes fun of it. So does her daughter.

However, things take a turn when she goes to the U.S. to help her sister out in organizing her (sister's) daughter's wedding. One bitter experience at a coffee shop makes her feel unwelcome at a foreign land due to her poor English, but she gathers courage and signs up for a course that assures English fluency in just 4 weeks. That's how her journey to a new land turns into a journey that transforms her life.

She is the most intelligent student in her class of seven, and everyone, including the instructor, start liking her instantly. The class, probably a tribute to/inspired by the one in "Mind Your Language" is filled with interesting people from different backgrounds.

I'm not going to give away any more of the movie's plot because I won't be doing justice to the screenplay no matter how hard I try to elegantly pen it down here. Seeing is believing.

The reason EV impressed me - and why I feel it's a must-watch - is that it's a glorious tale of feminism. Perhaps the essence of the movie lies in one particular dialogue of Shashi which means "I don't want love. I have enough of it. All I need is respect."

There are so many Shashis in the world. They might not be a part of the corporate world, they might not earn a hefty salary, but they're the most vital cog in the wheel of the family. In fact, the Ministry of Women and Child Development's recent proposal to make it mandatory for housewives to receive a certain amount of money from their husbands - for the regular work they do for the family - raised some important questions. Irrespective of whether this is a healthy move or not, there is no doubt that this proposal highlighted the fact that housewives' play a major but indirect role in the country's economy. In one way, they are unsung heroes too. EV touches upon this aspect. Housewives, if given the respect the deserve and the motivation they require, can do wonders.

The movie is filled with a lot of feel-good, as well as eye-opening moments. For some strange reason, I felt like I was watching a movie by Radha Mohan (the director of Mozhi, Payanam, Abhiyum Naanum and a few other Tamil movies) in the theatre. The characters are believable, and not just Sri Devi (whose character is inspired by the director's mother), all the other actors have a done a tremendous job too. Everyone can certainly feel proud of being a part of such a wonderful movie.

The dialogues are very witty and do pack a few heavy punches here and there. And if you're broad-minded and conscientious enough, you'll possibly feel guilty on hearing certain dialogues.

Unfortunately, EV comes with its own share of shortcomings too. One of those, and probably the most prominent one, would be the stereotyping of a few characters, especially the students: the Frenchman is a chef, the Tamilian is a software professional who is a self-proclaimed idli lover and Rajnikanth devotee, and the Pakistani is a cab driver. I believe we've seen a fair number of these portrayals in the media already. Gauri Shinde, the director, could have given a thought to this aspect.

Similarly, a friend of mine found the dialogue "The way you are surviving in India without knowing Hindi" objectionable. That's mainly because India is a multi-cultural country and Hindi is not the only language spoken here. But I guess the Tamil and Telugu versions of the movie might have different dialogues here. At least, I sincerely hope so.

But I believe these are just minor shortcomings, and do not affect the central theme of the movie in any way. As a movie that glorifies housewives and seeks to place them on an equal pedestal along with working men, EV strikes a chord with feminists, and strives to make people more broad-minded and considerate.


Trust me, EV is for sure a treat to watch. Watch it with an empty mind and come out of the theatre with one filled with insights on leading a happy familial life.

PS: It's heartening to see that the Tamil and Hindi film industries are coming up with many such thought-provoking cinemas of late, whereas the Telugu industry is still stuck with pointless and unbelievable heroism-based mass masala movies. Tollywood badly needs a reality check, and if it does not wish to undergo one, it can go fuck off.

The Need for Co-existence

Location: Avon Restaurant, Hosur Road, Koramangala

Time: 1 P.M.

Me: I’ll have one egg biriyani.

Friend 1, 2 & 3: We’ll have chicken biriyani.

Waiter: Ok, sir. 15 minutes.

[I should mention here that Friend 3 loves poking fun at random people in general, but also has a history of finding himself at the receiving end unexpectedly at times.]

Friend 3 (to tease the waiter): Aeeiinn.. Thoda ulli.. Illa illa.. Adhu enna da solvaanga?

Friend 1: Pyaaz.

Friend 3 (in broken Hindi): Aan! Pyaaz. Thoda pyaaz leke aao, bhai.

Waiter: Aen avlo kashta padreenga? Vengaayam-ne sollunga. [Why do you have to struggle so much? Just ask for vengaayam. (the Tamil word for onion)]

Me, Friend 1 & 2: Hahahahahahhahahahahahahhhahahha.. Bouuuuuu!!! [The same “bowwu” Dhanush uses in Why This Kolaveri Di song]

Friend 3: *awkward silence and sheepish looks*

Now, the reply (from the waiter) wouldn’t have caused embarrassment if it had come from a Tamilian. Not even if it were from a Telugu, Kannadiga or a Malayalee. But the fact that it was from a North-East person is what took us all by surprise, and made us roar with laughter the moment the sentence ended.

Further enquiry revealed that the waiter had worked in Tirupur for a few years before moving to Bengaluru, and that’s where he learnt Tamil. We were amazed by his proficiency in the language in that there was not a hint of non-native accent in his speech. He sounded very much like a native Tamilian. Unlike people who move to different cities to earn a livelihood and stubbornly refuse to learn the local language—and it’s a well-known fact that there are SO MANY such people in Bengaluru—this man made the effort to learn Tamil when he was in Tirupur, and made sure he’s a decent speaker.

There are definitely more such industrious NE people in our cities. Those whom I’ve interacted with so far have always been respectful and well-mannered. And, as their fellow citizens, we must treat them as our equals, and not as outsiders.

Now, there are some important facts about the North-Eastern states we must all know before we discriminate against people who come from there. I’m just using a couple of examples related to Assam here.

With an annual yield of 6,80,400 kg, Assam is the world’s largest tea-growing region. So the probability of your daily dose of tea—be it at home or at the tea stall—being made of leaves plucked in Assam is very high. Also, note that some tea stalls are run by Malayalees, which means the cup of tea is a symbol of national integration in itself.

Also, Assam is the hometown of India’s oldest refinery, the Digboi refinery which was commissioned in 1901. This refinery belongs to the state-owned oil company – IndianOil. There are two more refineries in Assam, one at Guwahati, and one at Bongaigaon. Again, there’s a probability of the fuel you fill in an IndianOil pump to be a produce of Assam. There is also the possibility of the Indane LPG cylinder you use at home for cooking being a produce of Assam.

Of course, IndianOil does have refineries at other states, and there is a possibility of our using the produce of those as well. That’s the level of dependency we find in our day-to-day life—a very important reason for co-existence.

Just imagine if the people of Assam try to create an indirect embargo on tea and petroleum trade to different parts of the country. It’d for sure affect normalcy throughout. The other states that supply their goods to the North-Eastern states can avenge for this through another embargo from their side. But it’ll never be of any use to anyone. The day we realize that we’re dependent on so many people for so many things in our life, and be thankful for what we get from them is the day we lay the foundation for growth.

We welcome the North-East monsoons wholeheartedly, but treat North-East manushans (people) in a very ugly way.

It’s time for us to change.

_______________________________________________________

Image courtesy: http://loveme4evers.wordpress.com/

Thanking Our Lucky Stars and Counting Our Blessings

I was struggling to get a better view of the road through the camera's viewfinder. It's not every day that you get to see wonderful sceneries on a highway, that too while the vehicle is still in motion. Viknesh was on the car's backseat, looking at the scenery to his left. Benjamin, wearing his 'cool' red sunglasses and cracking an occasional PJ, was driving cheerfully. 'Suttum vizhi chudare' from Ghajini was playing on the audio system.

Benjamin suddenly jammed the brakes and the Verna skid towards the right for a few metres, hit the median and turned sharp leftwards and descended into a pit dug up for the six-lane expansion project on the highway. Shaken and stirred, yet unhurt, all three of us got out of the car. A huge crowd surrounded us to check the scene.........

24/12/2011

The day our Christmas and New Year holiday commenced. All three of us were on our way home to spend the precious 9 days that made almost all our friends envy us. It was a bright day. The sun shone brighter than usual and we started our roadtrip around 7.45 AM. A Bengaluru-Chennai trip does not take more than 6 hours usually. But it took us nearly 15 hours that day – the reason, the accident we met with on our way.

Benjamin is not a reckless driver; he’s a highly responsible one. He does love speed, but he’s always in control of the vehicle. He reads Lakshmi’s (his car) mind and drives accordingly. But what can he only do when it was destined that a moronic and completely mindless lady with 0% road sense should screw up our day by causing a nearly fatal accident?

Also, it was Viknesh’s first ever road trip and he was looking forward to it eagerly ever since he knew about the plan. We were listening to Tamil movie songs on the car’s audio system and singing along happily. There were the occasional I’m-always-ready-to-race kind of drivers on the road and Ben showed them who the boss was time and again. Ben and I were determined to make Viknesh’s first ever road trip a very memorable one for him. We even put up our ‘Malarey mounama…’ performance, one of our most favourite pastimes, with me singing the male lines and Ben singing the female lines in the female voice – in this case, S Janaki’s.

Besides the fuel break at a petrol pump in Koramangala, the very long wait at each and every toll plaza and a brief pause for breakfast at a roadside eatery somewhere after Krishnagiri, there were no other halts during our journey. The journey itself was really smooth until a lady on a Scooty Pep with two kids crossed the road from the wrong side and made the whole event take a horrible turn. The ‘Wrong Turn’ in our lives......

Ben was driving steadily at a speed of 85-90 kmph because he realized that the car was consuming a lot of fuel at higher speeds. Just near this village called Elarappatti, he noticed a lady on a scooter with two kids crossing the road.

Now, let me tell you how she crossed the road. She started the scooter, rode a few metres forward, and stopped at the middle of the road for no reason whatsoever. Ben thought she was making way for us and steered right. The lady suddenly changed her mind and started the vehicle without realizing that she was crossing our path. This came as a bolt from the blue to Ben, who, just like Viknesh, was witness to the lady’s totally mindless act. He jammed the brakes because he had no other option. The car would have certainly hit the lady if he hadn’t done that.

The lady never stopped. She just sped away.

The camera slipped from my hands and fell near the pedals. My spectacles went flying and landed at the same spot. Unable to withstand the inertia, Viknesh automatically bent forward with his head almost getting stuck between the two seats in front.  The car came to a sudden standstill in the pit and the three of us emerged out totally unscathed.  I spat on the ground and out came blood instead of saliva. I had a very small wound inside my mouth. We realized it was the only physical injury any of us incurred and were glad that none of us got seriously injured. But Ben was completely inconsolable. He was broken into pieces when he saw that the front right tyre had burst and the impact had damaged the wheel’s rim and front bumper.

The highway maintenance team brought a tow truck to take the car out from the pit and the Verna had to be towed for nearly 50-60 km to Vellore, where the nearest Hyundai service station was located.

Among the people gathered around us was a highway patroller who saw the whole incident. As luck would have it, he affirmed the fact that the lady had caused the accident and that we had nothing to do with it. His presence in the scene helped us a lot in explaining the situation to the cops, who would later employ methods to extract money from us. Their cheapness became evident when they asked Ben to pay a huge sum of 3000 rupees as a bribe to give him the certificate required to claim insurance. Well, that’s another story altogether. But the irony is that the highway patroller was a policeman himself and was a very honest and helpful person at the same time. Duality is omnipresent.

The accident did give us a huge shock and traumatized us to a great extent. But in the end, we let perspective take charge and show us the good things that saved us from great peril.

What if the car had collided with the scooter? Three people would have died and three people would have been behind bars.

What if we hadn’t worn our seat belts? We would have definitely died on the spot or would have been injured seriously.

What if the highway patroller were not in the scene? It would have become difficult for us to explain our case to the police who would in turn try their best to milk money from us.

Finally, what if we didn’t have sane heads above our shoulders and a sense of humour inside those heads? We would have certainly found it very tough to cope up with difficult situations such as these.

Such infinite “what ifs” open up a myriad of grave possibilities that would have made things worse. Luckily, none of these “what ifs” took place and that’s the reason we are now counting our blessings and thanking our lucky stars for being on our side. That’s again the reason my belief in God (not deities, but a higher force that is above and within all of us) has increased. Considering the very next day was Christmas, it would have become much more difficult for our families if they were to hear bad news about their children. I, later, told Benjamin that he himself was the best Christmas gift his family got this year to which he nodded in the affirmative.

Amidst this chaos, there were other things that are definitely worth mentioning here – the importance of making people feel good, the joy of giving and the heartfelt blessings of a fellow human being.

There was a guy in the crowd, who, just like others, was inspecting the damaged car out of curiosity. He noticed that the car alone had suffered serious injuries whereas all three lives that travelled in it were unhurt. He said something that I’ll remember throughout my life. He said, “Neenga yaarukko romba nalla dharmam panni irukkeenga. Adhu dhaan ungala kaappatthichu.” (You have displayed great generosity to someone. That’s what saved you.) Read on.....

A few minutes before the accident, when we went to break our fast, a poor old lady, selling flowers, asked me to buy some. I refused and went ahead for breakfast. She came back again after we were done with our food and once again persuaded me to buy some flowers. I gave her ten rupees and she gave me a muzham (a forearm’s length) of jasmine she had. She told me that her business wasn’t doing well and asked me for ten more rupees. I felt bad for her and gave her what she asked. She blessed us saying, “Unakku romba punniyama poagum.” (May all blessings be with you.) I then placed the flowers on the picture of Jesus Christ stuck to the car’s dashboard.

I wouldn’t have realized the depth and sincerity of the old lady’s words if we hadn’t met with the accident and the stranger hadn’t spoken about the value of generosity. I got reminded of an old Tamil song that goes, “Dharmam thalai kaakkum; thakka samayatthil uyir kaakkum.” (Dharma saves your head; and at the appropriate time it also saves your life.)

Another lesson we learnt is on the importance of a sense of humour. Well, what has happened has happened. There is no way you can undo it. That being the case, what’s the point in feeling unending sorrow? Moving on is the only best thing possible. I got reminded of a quote by Kahlil Gibran: “A sense of humour is a sense of proportion.”

We also found solace in the fact that good people still roam the earth. The highway patroller, the maintenance guys from L&T and the mineral water can storehouse owner who offered us help increased our belief in humanity. We complain about bad people, but we fail to realize that goodness is inherent in all of us. It’s just that we let selfishness cloud our minds.

This accident definitely shook our souls, but there is no denying that it came along with its own share of lessons on life and living. Most important of all, I came to know about how making people feel good works wonders in life.

I turn 21 today and I’d now like to make a birthday resolution that I’ll always try my best to make people feel good. Even if I can’t, I’ll at least try my best to not make them feel bad. After all, there’s nothing we would take along with us on our final journey. Why make the journey of life miserable for our fellow human beings, brothers and sisters?

Life is fragile. Life is cruel. Yet life is sweet. Life is beautiful.

A Walk to Remember

It was around 10PM that night and I was taking a shower. Suddenly, my mind went back to a conversation that I had with my best friend Safwan on the 11th of September, 2010. We had gone to the Connemara Library and had our lunch at a small eatery nearby. Our next plan was to visit the then newly-opened Express Avenue. As is our habit, we decided to walk all the way from the library to the shopping mall. That is a staggering distance of around 3.5 kms.

My grandmother had passed away only the previous week, so we were talking about her and the funeral ceremony in general. Safwan lost his grandmother a couple of years back. He told me how nearly one thousand people had attended his grandmother's last rites and how much respect they all had for her.

I realized that his grandmother was unlike mine. Honestly speaking, I have never had a close relationship with either of my grandmothers. My maternal grandmother lived more than 400 kms away from us, so we couldn't visit her often. Unfortunately, though my paternal grandmother lived with us, she maintained a great emotional distance with us which made it seem as if she also lived 400 kms away from us. There were many reasons for us to feel this way. I don't want to get into details here though.

But then, I was pouring out my frustration towards my grandmother's ways and how she treated us when she was alive. Safwan listened to all that and asked me if I had heard of a particular story about a father and his two sons. I said I wasn't aware and he told me the story. It went like this:

A highly abusive and alcoholic person had two sons. He used to pick up fights in the neighbourhood and earned a reputation for 'pure evil.' His wife, unable to bear his atrocities, died at a very young age. The irresponsible father never cared for his sons and the two of them grew up on their own. The elder son grew up and became as abusive and reckless as his father. No one respected him and never wished to maintain a cordial relationship with him.

On the other hand, the younger son went on to become a mature individual who behaved responsibly and earned a good name in the society. He tasted success in all his ventures and everyone admired him for his determination and courage.

One day, one of the younger son's friends asked him, "Your father is the worst person I have ever known personally and your brother is the second worst. How come you alone are different from them?"

To this, the 'odd man out' replied, "My brother considered my father a role model of 'how to live' and I considered the same person a role model of 'how not to live'. That's what made me stand apart from them."

The friend was quite surprised by the answer and acquired some essential wisdom for life.

By the time Safwan finished telling this story, we had almost reached Express Avenue. I learnt a great lesson that day. You would have come across that lesson time and again in your lives.

The lesson is: "Everyone has something to teach. It's what we learn and how we learn it that moulds our characters."

Safwan and I have walked long distances on previous occasions too and those memories will be fresh in my mind as well. The reason for that would be either something humourous or unusual. But the reason to remember this particular walk till death is something worth cherishing. I had learnt a highly valuable lesson.

The Art of Parenting

“And a woman who held a babe against her bosom said, "Speak to us of Children."

And he said:

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts.
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.”

       - An excerpt from Kahlil Gibran’s “The Prophet”

I’m not sure how many people have read these words, or how many people have realized the truth behind these words through their experiences in life. But what I’m sure of is a major portion of Indian parents, especially those belonging to the middle class, would not even understand what Gibran conveys through these words. Even if they do understand, they would never apply it in their lives.

That brings us to the ever-raging debate of ‘responsible parenting.’ “India is progressing in many areas, but Indian people are not.” This argument holds good even when you consider the Indian way of parenting. Despite various rational explanations and realizations, this particular area is in a standstill. Most of the Indian youth still do not pursue their passions due to the overwhelming compulsion of their parents. Be it professional life, or personal life, it is the parents who still have the rights to make the final decision.

Going back to the Vedic period, children were sent to gurukulas, where they learnt whatever they wished to learn and attained excellence in it. Perhaps, that’s how ancient India had an abundance of skilled artisans in different fields, which eventually brought in a great deal of wealth to the whole nation. Children learnt what they wanted to learn and did what they wanted to do. But the present day scenario is diametrically opposite to the aforementioned case. Citing reasons such as financial security in the long run, today’s parents do not allow their children to pursue their own passions.

First of all, parents mainly think that children lack experience and that this lack of experience would not help them in life. So what? The child has so many years of life left. He/she would continue to learn till death. ‘No matter how hard you teach, anyone can understand anything only if he/she puts in the same effort to learn.’ Today’s advice-o-phobic youth wants to experience everything firsthand. While this may not be possible and advisable in each and every case, it is worth taking the risk in simple things.

The Western way of bringing up kids is quite commendable. The child is a part of the family only till a particular age. After that, one has to go on with life on one’s own. We may observe this wonderful trend among animals. A tiger raises and takes care of its cubs only till a certain age, after which the cubs become ‘solitary reapers.’ This practice is not restricted only to tigers, but can be noticed in the case of almost all animals. If that’s how nature wants things to be, why should we attempt to alter it? Precisely, that’s what Indian parents do. Attempt to alter the way of nature.

To be honest, we still live in a backward society. How can we call ourselves ‘forward-thinking,’ when the freedom and interests of individuals are not respected? Children should be motivated to live and do things on their own. After all, we live only once. Why should we convince and console ourselves if we can’t achieve our dreams? In fact, parents should be the first people to teach and inspire their children to dream and pursue those dreams. They should not exhibit any kind of negativity in their thoughts or words.

The matter gets worse when it comes to personal life. Most youngsters do not end up marrying the ones they love sincerely and wholeheartedly. Broken hearts, lifelong grievances and unhappy lives are what we find frequently due to love affairs that do not end in marriage. What kind of freedom is it if a person cannot marry the one whom he/she loves?
I don’t suggest that parents abandon their children and go on with their own lives. I only suggest that parents stop holding their children’s hands when the latter become 100% confident of walking on their own.

Parenting is an art. Perhaps, that’s why we rarely see a da Vinci or a Picasso amidst us.

My Perspective on Happiness

The girl I love had once asked me if I have any posts about happiness. I've been trying to come up with one ever since she made that request, but in vain.

The reason is very simple. You can 'feel' happy to any extent, but you would definitely find it difficult to 'describe' it or 'define' it. But I've just made an attempt to pour out my thoughts about it.

Let me tell you one thing very well in advance. You'd have definitely come across whatever I say here through any media, through anyone. So it might sound redundant. Please bear with it if so.

After some brainstorming and intense introspection, I concluded that happiness is nothing but the state of feeling good. That's it? Is it as simple as that? Well, it may look simple. But in fact, it is highly complex.

Now, let me tell you more about this state of feeling good. This state is absolutely intrinsic and is unfazed due to external circumstances. I'm now reminded of a statement that I used to tell my mother when I was in 7th standard: "I'll surely be the class topper if Jagadish is not my classmate." Here I am making use of the word 'if'. Those with a computer science background would have realized what I'm talking about.

We use 'if' only to introduce conditions. We can use this 'if' in both positive ways as well as negative ways.

For example, you can say, "I'll succeed if I work hard."

or

"I'll be happy if you leave me alone.", "I'll be happy if I have an iPod."

That's the difference. You are concerned with your self in the former and you are concerned with a different person or a thing in the latter.

You will never find happiness if you look for it elsewhere. Happiness is always where it is, within the self. What is this self?

The definition of the self is highly spiritual. If you have an idea about what the soul is you'll have an idea about what the self is. Both are one and the same.

The body has its limits but the self does not. It's an unlimited entity. It's completely capable of achieving anything. That's why it is highly important for one to be sure or confident of one's self.

You probably might have not experienced the power of the self in real life and are hence sceptical about it.

Detach your self from the 'if's. A change of thought can certainly brighten up your mood and help you sustain it.

That doesn't mean that you should renounce all your materialistic pleasures. It only means that you should realize that you are greater than all those things put together. An iPod is just a thing that is there to entertain you; you are its master. Being the master you should be able to live without it. Remember, the master is always powerful than the servant. So the former should definitely be able to do whatever the latter can.

Having confused you a bit, I would like to jump to a different facet or dimension that is concerned with being happy. The first thing one needs to do in order to be happy is to be thankful.

Be thankful for sitting in front of a computer reading this blog post. Because, there are millions of people in the world who don't know to read and an equal number of people who haven't even heard of a computer.

Be thankful for each and every thing you have in life. Don't worry if you don't have something today. You'll get it tomorrow. Now that brings us to another thing.

Hope.

That four letter word which is as indispensable as love. I strongly feel that hope is not a dead thing. It is in fact, a good thing. That's what makes you accomplish things.

I fell in love with this quote the moment I saw it, which is nearly 5 years ago.

"The difference between an optimist and a pessimist is droll;
The former sees the donut, the latter sees the hole."

I'm an optimist. I'm grateful for whatever I have in life.

I'm grateful for the wonderful parents I've got.
I'm grateful for the highly supportive friends I've got.
I'm grateful to the arts which never fail to make me feel good. Perhaps that's the reason I'm good at them.
I'm grateful to my teachers.
I'm grateful...
I'm grateful...

The list goes on and on. I'm grateful for each and every thing that happens in my life. This is what they call looking at things in the right perspective.

I don't feel bad that the girl I love doesn't reciprocate my feelings. I only feel happy that I can love someone so much. Isn't that something one should feel really happy for?

I'm grateful to her for making me realize the magnitude and intensity of love that is present in me.

And I hope that all will be well in the end.

As you sow, so shall you reap.

I've sown something invaluable. So, I'll definitely not fail.
This is a matter of hope. It makes me feel good.

I'm grateful and hopeful. I'm grateful for the past and hopeful for the future.

Hence I'm happy. :)

I don't know if I have confused you or if I have helped you come to a conclusion.

Feel happy if I have confused you, because conclusion follows confusion. Feel happy if I have made my point clear because I have helped you reach a conclusion.

My Perspective on 'The Lost Symbol'

Criticism is something that I haven't ventured into yet. But my mind kept telling me again and again to write my views about 'The Lost Symbol' just after I finished reading it. The reason is still unknown but here is what I truly think about the latest venture of Dan Brown.

The Lost Symbol is a typical Langdon-ish novel. This is how it is: Robert Langdon - Summoned to a famous spot on an unusual hour of the day - Witnesses something highly disturbing - A secret society resurfaces - Head of the society is Langdon's close friend - Startling revelations - A powerful message in the end.

So this is the skeleton of a Dan Brown's novel in which Langdon is the lead character. I was mighty impressed by 'Angels and Demons' that I read it 4 times. And the beauty of the story is that I understood its true meaning only when I read it for the fourth time. Hmmm. My intellect wasn't that matured in the year 2005 I guess.

My personal opinion is that Angels and Demons is far better than the Da Vinci Code in many ways. But it is a pity that the former is highly underrated. What impressed me greatly in Angels and Demons is that its theme and message is universal whereas that of the Da Vinci Code is meant for a particular sect of people. Interestingly, the largest in the world. No wonder it kicked off a great controversy.

The most important message that Angels and Demons conveyed was, 'Spirituality and science are not different from one another and that ancient wisdom was far advanced than modern intellect'. [Or, that's the message that I inferred from the book.]

Excuse me, what do all these have to do with 'the Lost Symbol'. Getting to it.

Dan Brown conveys the same message in 'The Lost Symbol'. But the difference lies in the location and the secret society involved. The location being Washington D.C this time and the society being the Brotherhood of the Freemasons. The author has made a great effort to recreate the magic he weaved in 'A & D' and has also succeeded greatly. This time it is better, grander and bigger. The information he shares about the society and the way he solves the huge jigsaw puzzle is completely mindblowing.

I have always strongly believed that our Indian rishis possessed unsurpassable knowledge. Of course, I later realized that great minds from all ancient civilizations possessed the same intellectual wealth. Dan highly glorifies those thousands of wise sages of olden times, belonging to all cultures and civilizations in 'the Lost Symbol'. Like mentioned earlier, this is the second time he does it. But he does it in a greater manner.

One thing that I found to be a bit poor in 'the Lost Symbol' is the portrayal of the villain. That is unconvincing and Dan's vain efforts to make the villain look terrifying and fearsome is evident.

The plot is for sure redundant, but still it is a fast-paced thriller. Redundancy is something unwelcome in the field of arts and I'm sure that well-learned hardcore fans of Dan Brown would have certainly been disappointed by 'the Lost Symbol'. But, that is not the biggest problem. Mankind still chooses to stay in darkness despite millions of men proclaiming that there is eternal light, since time immemorial. Dan Brown is also one among those millions who wish to make man aware of his true capability.

I'm the kind of person who gives more importance to the message that is conveyed rather than to the way it is conveyed. So it is only obvious that I'd love 'the Lost Symbol' to a great extent because the message it conveys is great, true and eternal.

Some people may not appreciate or accept my views about this book. I don't even care about it.

I'd silently think of the words Dean Galloway utters.

"You do not yet have eyes to see."

About Love

It has been very long since I updated this blog. To tell the truth I didn't find any worthwhile topics to write about. I know there are a lot of things in this world to talk and comment about. I can forever keep complaining. I can forever keep ranting about the atrocities going on in the world. But are my rants going to bring about any change? It is only action that can make it possible.

Well, as the title of this post suggests I'd like to talk 'About Love' in this post.

You might be interested in knowing what prompts me to write about love now. Well, I came across a line in one of my favourite Tamil songs. I've known that song for the past 5 years but only last night did I put my thoughts deep into it. In fact, it is a beautiful movie and the song is equally beautiful.

Okay okay. I can hear you people saying "Enough of your 'mokkai' Vinay. Come to the point." He he. Fine.

'Ulagatthil ulla chithravadhaikkellaam chella peyar vaitthaal kaadhal..'

This is the line that I'm talking about. Well what does it mean?

"Love is the beautiful name given to the collection of all the tortures of the world"
[I'm totally sorry if the translation sucks buddies]

It is a well known fact that 'A rose is a rose no matter what name you give it." Similarly 'love' is certainly a collection of tortures no matter how you call it or what name you give it.

I'm a person who tells everyone to share love. So isn't it ironical to say that love is a collection of tortures? Yes, it is. That's how love is and that's how lovers consider it today, right? The original definition of love has been lost long ago. Today's people have redefined the term completely.

Friends, there are two kinds of people: those who think with their heart and those who think with their mind. The former are always concerned with human emotions and many other stuff that are considered to be 'unnecessary and waste' by the latter. Loving comes as naturally as breathing for those who think with their mind. Their love is unconditional and they demand nothing from others.

Unfortunately, we live in an age when a person loves another just for his/her money or just to pass time and to forget boredom. It has become very difficult to find love in almost all walks of our lives. People send their parents to old age homes; neighbours are alien to them. And the worst treatment of love is faced by Mother Nature herself. In the name of technological advancement we have only polluted water bodies and the atmosphere making life difficult for all.

Well, I hope my dear friend would not mind using him as an example here. I don't want to disclose his name too.

My friend rides his bike with me being the pillion rider and thousand other morons as 'roadmates'. It's not needed to say how horrible the traffic in Mount Road would be at 8PM during weekdays. Chennai-ites! Need I say about it? Everyone finds it difficult to move forward in that traffic and my friend is not an exception. Is a text message so important at this kind of a situation? My friend isn't so insane to be texting while riding a bike in such a road. But it is his lover who expects a prompt reply from him!! Come on people! It does not mean that a person loves you truly only if he/she sends quick replies to your messages. You never know what kind of a situation he/she is in. This only shows a lack of understanding.

This is certainly not how I envision love. So it means that either others are unaware of true love or that my perspective about love is incorrect. What do you say?